11 best sidekicks (no Jar Jar Binks here)

It's always the leading person that claims all the glory, grabs all the headlines and that everyone remembers but where would Captain Hook be without Smee (who had no rank oddly), Shrek without Donkey or The Beatles without Ringo Starr? No-one gets through sidekicks like Dr. Who but here's another random list of those closely linked to the main person in books/games/tv/films.

11. Patrick Starfish from SpongeBob SquarePants
Where would SpongeBob be without Patrick, the loveable pink blob that lives under a rock next door, when SpongeBob goes on an adventure, Patrick is always by his side. Portrayed as being fat, lazy, ignorant and unintelligent (not to mention the only character without a nose), it has to be asked in an underwater world where everyone works for a living, why doesn't Patrick (presumably he borrows from a loan shark) though this means he's always at SpongeBob's beck and call. That you can follow him on Twitter https://twitter.com/#!/Patrick_Star and Facebook https://www.facebook.com/patrickstar show he is clearly as much of a fans favourite as SpongeBob himself.

10. Lewis from Inspector Morse
Lewis (not to be confused with Officer Anne Lewis from RoboCop) is a Detective Sergeant who was the sidekick to Inspector Morse in all 13 books by Colin Dexter. Set in Oxford, England (who would of thought so much crime needed solving there). A bit like the great detective predecessor Sherlock Holmes having Dr. Watson, Lewis was constantly put down with comments or demeaned by Morse who meant this in a playful manner.

9. Luigi from Super Mario Bros.
So if they are 'super' Mario brothers, that would make the surname Mario.....which makes Mario become Mario Mario (a sentence with Mario in 5 times is too much) and Luigi is the green overall wearing alternative to his red wearing brother. First appearing in 1983, Luigi is sometimes portrayed as a more cowardly (especially around ghosts) character than the brave heroic Mario though both have the same aim which is to save Princess Daisy. While Mario is portrayed as a typical Italian American, Luigi comes across more of a stereotype Italian, I bet he loves a Dolmio Day.

8. Garth Algar from Wayne's World
Played by Dana Carvey in the movie's, Garth was Wayne Campbell's wingman, ever eager to help him with his musical endeavours and 'schwing' when a foxy lady walks past. Garth would almost blunder his way through life but to his friend Wayne, everything he did was 'cool'. I have a theory that when Garth grew up, he had a sex change and became JK Rowling.

7. Dr. Watson from Sherlock Holmes
Perhaps the most known sidekick, at least from classic literature, Dr. Watson was an assistant and sometime flatmate of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's great detective and narrated all but 4 of the books featuring Holmes. Although he never actually uses these words, 'Elementary, my dear Watson' is a part of modern speech when someone cottons onto what someone is trying to explain to them. With a medical background (he is a Dr. after all), it's a wonder he was a sidekick to a detective but this made the relationship between the pair all the more interesting.

6. Robin from Batman   
Robin was first played by Richard 'Dick' Grayson way back in 1940 and since then has been played by 4 others in the popular comic. In  1983 when Grayson left to become Nightwing, Jason Todd took the role though was later brutally killed by The Joker in 1989. Since then the character has been portrayed by Tim Drake, Stephanie Brown (the only female Robin) and is currently Damian Wayne, Batman's son. While most of the movies feature Batman alone with no sidekick, it was the popular 1966 ABC series 'Batman' that people most remember Robin. Batman & Robin are often referred to as The Caped Crusaders or The Dynamic Duo. Debates rage over whether Batman needs a Robin but the Batman universe is richer for having the character but Robin is essentially an early teen fighting crime and supervillains....please kids, don't try this at home.

5. Chewbacca from Star Wars
Chewbacca is a 7 foot tall version of Cousin It from The Addams family who barks and growls in a way only Han Solo can understand. The gentle co-pilot of Solo's Millennium Falcon featured in 4 of the 6 Star Wars movies and classic lines like 'Aaaaaaaaaargh!' and 'Urgh' have led him to becoming a firm fan favourite. In the 1978 Star Wars holiday special, Chewbacca's wife and kids can be seen as we got to visit his homeworld Kashyyyk (28 points in Scrabble) and has no-one ever asked the question, what does Chewbacca smell like?

4. KITT from Knight Rider
Seriously! just look at that car, that's why it's included in this list, not to mention it's a talking car that can drive itself, maybe they know Optimus Prime

3. Gromit from Wallace & Gromit
The hugely popular BBC plasticine adventurers  have survived every story by virtue of Gromit. While Wallace dithers about inventing the most useless creations and getting the pair into trouble, it's Gromit that keeps a cool head so they always prevail. First appearing in 1989's A Grand Day Out, Gromit has no visible mouth and never speaks a word but has there ever been a more expressive character to grace our screens?

2. Short Round from Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom

Why does he feature on the list let alone at number 2? because he's not Shia Lebeouf! Short Round almost encompasses what was so great about the first 3 Indiana Jones films, the vaudeville-esqe slapstick routines, the adventures where everything was survived by the skin of your teeth (teeth don't even have skin) and just dumb luck.  Temple Of Doom saw Indiana skirting around Shanghai with 11 year old Short Round (played by Jonathan Ke Quan who's other film of notice is The Goonies where he played Data) who serve's as a perfect addition to add friction to Indy's personality. From Shocking Dr. Jones out of hypnosis to driving a 1936 Speedster in a car chase, Short Round shouldered a lot of the burden in defeating the treacherous Mola Ram

1. Ron Weasley/Hermione Grainger from the Harry Potter franchise
The perfect sidekick(s) because throughout all the books, they feature as main characters alongside Harry Potter and without them, he probably would still be wondering where the Philosophers Stone is, trapped in the Chamber Of Secrets or even a prisoner in Azkaban. Ron was fantastic in his role of encouraging Harry to do risky and daring ventures while Hermione was the brains behind the trio, take any of these away and the chemistry is gone along with the chance of success. Though hero is the titular hero, it's only as he was sheltered from this world of witches and wizards so his innocence helps the reader to understand this wonderful world and have everything explained for us poor, plain muggles. In reality, the last book should of been called Harry Potter, Ron Weasley And Hermione Grainger And The Deathly Hallows but I guess the spines on books have only so much room to print titles.

Music (written in Tennessee, the home of US music)

Music is important in life, imagine (not meant as a reference to John Lennon) a world without tunes, without lyrics or the memories attached to hearing something you’ve not heard for a while, music can bring untold joy and also extreme sadness, it's both a sign of celebration and lamentation. One of the things both America and Britain have in common is a shared love of music and musical artists, with both singing in English, they are easily able to cross the Atlantic and perform to audiences and it’s not even possible to decide who makes the better music, America has Bob Dylan, Johnny Cash, Elvis (only needs one name, you know I don’t mean Costello) and Michael Jackson, Britain has The Beatles, The Stones, Led Zeppelin and Elton John, both have sold millions each side of the pond, both have sold out arenas too and both have legions of fans not just in these two countries but around the world.

   It’s all good having mainstream artists crossing over in 2011, it’s easy to have access to them in this day and age with music TV channels, the internet and an untold amount of radio stations specializing in every type of music you can name and even more that you can’t.

Elton John

   The start of modern music as we know started in late 40’s/early 50’s America, growing from predominately black church gospel music, jazz and blues (though no-one should ever discount classical music, most modern classical music devised nowadays is used as movie soundtracks). the world famous Sun Studios was opened in Memphis, Tennessee, in 1950 and artists like B.B. King, Johnny Cash, Elvis (Presley not Costello remember) and Jerry Lee Lewis made records, other acts like Bill Haley & The Comets, Buddy Holly and Chuck Berry were also producing songs which are still played and loved over 60 years later. From this new sound of ‘rock and roll’, many aspiring artists heard something which resonated in a post war Britain, people like Keith Richards, John Lennon (ironic that an American killed John Lennon in New York, or was he aiming for Yoko and she ducked?) and Pete Townsend heard this new sound and were inspired to learn how to play guitar (before it was mainly the banjo or piano that was learnt on British shores) and they spent many an hour trying to tune into the infamous pirate radio station Radio Luxembourg to hear the new songs by these artists that belonged to them, not their parents, this was a huge catalyst for the post war generation to step out the shadows (Cliff Richard stayed with them) and have their own lives and culture.

   In the mid 60’s, Britain had a wave of artists and bands that were inspired by this movement, we’ve all seen famous images of The Beatles landing in New York in 1964 (The extent of Beatlemania in the United States is evidenced by their single and album sales. "The Beatles had the Number One single for 59 weeks during their six and half years spanning ‘I Want To Hold Your Hand’s’ first appearance at the top on 1 February 1964 and Let It Be LP's last Number One Week, 4 July 1970. In the same period they topped the LP charts for 116 weeks. In other words they had the Number One single one out of every six weeks, and the top album one out of three). Over the decades countless artists have crossed over, though I’m not sure about American artists, certainly British artists are deemed to of truly made it once they have ‘broken the States’ which means made a name for themselves over there (for that reason Robbie Williams is a loser).

   In recent years American artists before they have become mainstream in their homeland have gone to the UK, made a name and become popular which has then transferred back, I remember The Killers supporting British Sea Power (remember them?) above a pub in my hometown of Lincoln (England) in 2003, this was a venue probably as big as the room your reading this in, it held about 80 people and was very cramped. The Killers and Kings Of Leon come to mind as bands who felt and knew they had talent, they knew they could move onto a bigger stage but felt undervalued in their home countries so tried in the UK, a country they wanted to spend time in and play to fans they knew would adore them. I feel the UK is more cutting edge in musical tastes, people want to be trendy and music bible NME (New Musical Express, a weekly music magazine) help people discover new bands and give them a platform, though America is a HUGE country so touring and making your name to a larger population isn’t as easy to do, ultimately good talent always shines through (except Justin Bieber, seriously, WTF?).

There are only two differences I can see between these two musical cultures, first is live music, I have been to gig in London on a Saturday and the following Friday I went to one in Nashville (aka Music City USA), it seems as Britain is a far smaller country than the States, artists don’t have to travel far to tour in comparison so quality and quantity is huge, in the UK, I live over the road from the famous Wedgewoodwatch through each song and applaud at the end. It’s not that either audience is more appreciative, it’s more about the energy, maybe I need to go see more in different venues across the States, it’s a perfect excuse to.

   The other difference is country music, it’s a regional thing, and it’s historically about things affecting the lives of people in the southern States, like farming, barn dances or….ticks! (Brad Paisley(?) had a no.1 hit in the States with a song about Ticks!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tiPndMqxLQ  ). Artists such as Mr. Tickman Paisley, Taylor Swift and Toby Keith are household names and sell records in huge volume but overseas, they don’t do so well as it’s a style and of content people can’t relate to, a top London thinks a tick is something put in a box if something is correct, not some literally blood sucking parasite (I did get a tick a few weeks ago in my leg and had to pull it out with tweasers, I don’t think I can ever get used to the bugs here, because of so many bug bites my legs look like the opening scene from Saving Private Ryan). To me it seems almost uneducated and painful to have to hear but having delved into it more, it seems pre 1980(ish) it had huge meaning and content but since then, the artists seem awful corporate cookie-cutter recycled garbage which is what country isn’t meant to be. Music evolves though and as I don’t like it, I can just tune into another station.

Ultimately when people are asked to name a favourite artist, band, song or album, they automatically bunch American and British artists together, I’d say Johnny Cash, Oasis, Nirvana and The Beatles and not even think of the nationality of either. Movies in the UK are either American or British, music is simply music and that is in my opinion, the closest bond the two countries have.

Top 7 dragons from video games

 With 2012 being the Chinese year of the dragon, the scaled mythological beasts have been ever present in the likes of Game Of Thrones, Dragon's Dogma and those still playing Skyrim. The pieces of merchandise featuring dragons has soared  such as notebooks, ornaments and pendants as they become ever more popular. 

   But what are the 8 greatest dragons from video games I hear you ask (actually no-one asked, but this is my random blog) so let's enter the dragon's den :-

8. Dragon Man from Altered Beast (1989 for Sega Mega Drive/Genesis)

Altered Beast was originally an arcade classic about a Roman centurion who after dying is resurrected by Zeus (got to love the attention to timescale in these games) who circles through Hell to save Zeus' daughter Athena from the demon God called Neff (yes....Neff!), the hero gets jacked up and can transform into animal forms of a tiger, a bear and best of all....a dragon, it's basically a shape shifting version of Dante's inferno.

7. Tyris Flare's dragon from Golden Axe (1989 for Sega Mega Drive/Genesis) 

Golden Axe was a game where you and a friend could pair up and fight medieval vagabonds side by side and one feature was building up magic, the story was very similar to that of the Conan The Barbarian movie. Players could play as a dwarf called Gillius, a barbarian called Ax or a red-headed Amazonian in chainmail bikini and red boots who had the magic ability of fire and when this was built up she could summon a dragon to come down and breath fire to vanquish foes off the screen (playing with a friend meant shared magic resources so many an argument was had when 'I accidently pressed it' was heard.

6. Billy & Jimmy Lee from Double Dragon (1987 for arcade and later NES and Sega Master System)

Okay, so they aren't technically dragons, in fact they are humans but these twins (also known as Hammer and Spike)  were a genre definer. They set the trend for future beat 'em ups like Streets Of Rage (I have TMNT: Turtles In Time on my PS3, it's the still the same concept today) in that two people could play together and not only beat bad guys but pick up weapons they dropped and could also double team (not in that way) opponents, the only odd thing was the twin brothers were out to save their common love interest Marian....maybe they were from Norfolk. This game was so successful there was an animated TV series and even a movie in 1994 starring Scott Wolf, Robert Patrick and Alyssa Milano which was the 166th highest grossing film of 1994, that tells you how bad it is. There is no real reference as to why they are 'dragons'...maybe Duncan Banatyne is a relative)

 

5. Yoshi (various Super Mario Bros games from 1990)

Yoshi would easily be one of the best and most easily recognisable sidekicks of all time as well as being the most popular video game dragon from the amount of games he has appeared in (not to mention the sheer volume of Yoshi merchandise with his likeness and image, girls like him and guys don't mind him). Yoshi always plays hard and has that forever happy smile on his face. Appearing first in 1990's Super Mario World and has featured constantly on any Mario or Nintendo title since as well as being a 6 foot animatronic puppet in 1994's Super Mario Bros. movie....though that's best left forgotten

4. Bahamut (various Final Fantasy games)

Though his allegiance has changed several times throughout the series, Bahamut is a staple of the Final Fantasy Series and even featured in Super Mario RPG. appearing in the very first Final Fantasy game in 1987(2010 saw the release of Final Fantasy XIV), there was even a spin off game in 1996 called Bahamut's Lagoon. As big and as bas as they come and almost as old as computer games themselves.

3. Alduin (2011 for The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim on PC, xBox 360 and PS3)

This gigantic dragon is the biggest, baddest and brutal of all of Skyrim's flying fire-breathing lizards, this from a game FULL of flying, fire-breathing lizards, is a claim to fame though players are made to feel that him appearing as a world-devouring, fire-breathing serpent is something of a come down as he's a God though oddly, the way to beat him is by shouting at him, that's right, shouting! If only the police could harness such powerful tools to fight crime.

2. Thanatos (1986 for Spectrum, Commodore and Amstrad)

Thantos scores so highly as it was arguably the first video game featuring a dragon and one where players could experience the feeling of controlling a huge, devastating fire-spewing behemoth for themselves. The game was on Spectrum, Commodore and Amstrad so controlling it was pretty much a case of wiggling the joystick (back then it was a joystick and just one button) but for it's time it was darn impressive and the game was simple, no complicated mythology added here, just breathing out fire, eating the locals and trying not to get slain.......being a dragon can be really tough sometimes.

1. Spyro (1998 for Sony PlayStation (PS1))

Most of the dragons mentioned (one wasn't even actually a dragon) are of the scaly, hateful vengeful type, so here is a dragon that was born of a good egg. Spyro is the dragon that comes to mind when asking 'name a video game dragon', and one people at least know the name of (rather than 'one from Skyrim' or 'isn't there one in Final Fantasy?'). Spyro has an overwhelming need to please and became adored by any girl who had a PlayStation when he came out in 1998). Spyro stands out for his colour and size alone, he's a tiny (in comparison to other dragons) purple guy though that didn't mean he couldn't hold his own in beating the bad guys. Expanding his moves beyond fire breathing to ramming enemies with his horns and over time, spitting ice and electricity, this little fella certainly had no Napoleon complex going on.

Homosexuality in sport

We live in an ever increasingly more liberal and relaxed society in this day and age, if someone is gay, what does it matter? I have worked with both male and female homosexuals and been able to say one or two have become close friends and I enjoy that they are comfortable and proud about their sexuality. In all professions it's not an issue but why is sport, seen as a predominately heterosexual environment, an area where athletes are either simply not gay, or most likely uncomfortable with announcing the their true selves..

It's estimated that 6% of the UK's population is gay, that's roughly one in 20 people (no pun intended) so for an average sports team, that would mean 1-2 members would have a different orientation to the rest of the squad, yet how many sports stars could you name that have come out?

The UK's most popular sport is football (soccer) and to date, Justin Fashanu is the first and only footballer to have openly 'come out' which he did in October 1990 in The Sun tabloid newspaper, Fashanu commit suicide in 1997 after sexual allegation charges were brought against him by a 17 year old, in his suicide note he wrote "I realised that I had already been presumed guilty. I do not want to give any more embarrassment to my friends and family.", the same paper that was happy to 'out' him had constantly linked him with unnamed MPs, football players and pop stars, which Fashanu had to frequently deny were untrue. It seems the same media outlet, The Sun, that was happy to publicise someone's sexuality, was also happy to wilfully imply sexual encounters and this would of had the reverse effect of what Fashanu intended and he was quite vocal in how this made him feel ostracised, particularly from his own family.

From this experience, it's hardly a surprise that other footballers would be tempted to 'come out the closet' in a similar fashion. The simple fact is that tabloid newspapers would have a field day with joke headlines or constant photos of shirtless hugging not to mention the barrage of accusations with people of the same sex such as Justin Fashanu had to constantly deny. On 19th April 2012, just over a month after I'm writing this, The Sun newspaper had the front page headline of 'Jessie Gay' where reality TV judge Jessie J was publicly outed as a lesbian, in this day and age I would argue that isn't news, let alone front page headline news. It also felt compelled to give the news that Simon Cowell, a rival reality TV judge, wasn't gay! They actually wrote, on the front of their paper that someone wasn't gay.....this is 2012!! That same day there were other news stories such as 3 soldiers killed in Afghanistan, French elections and the UK's largest supermarket Tesco reporting a downfall in profits due to the recession, none of that matters though as someone is gay and someone else isn't.

   The way the media would use such a 'story' has to be the main reason that sports stars would be tentative to be comfortable with coming out. In all honesty, Lionel Messi is considered the best footballer on the planet right now, if he was gay, would that mean that fans didn't want him to sign for their team? Of course not. Would rival fans boo him? Of course not. Would the tabloid press have and endless amount of sly comments and innuendo? yes, constantly. Just as The Sun did with Justin Fashanu, it was happy to publicise his sexuality to sell papers and it was happy to turn on him in an attempt to sell more and after how Justin Fashanu's life ended, who could blame sports stars from feeling a need to stay silent?

the cost of EuroVision....a £30m postcard

It's that time of year again, the time when Europe (and for some reason Israel) unites for the colourful and enigmatic Europop tradition that is Eurovision, an event that started in 1956 and is still going strong today. While most of us look down at the event, most of the performances are interesting (I'm being polite) and the politics that goes with the event's scoring system (the Eastern Europeans always seem to vote for each other though to be fair, the UK does always give Ireland points for some reason) are a tradition which in any other international event would be illegal.



   The big news going into tonight's show is that some countries have openly told their contestants to NOT win! Whichever country wins the event then has to host the following year, the estimated cost is £28-30million, unlike a sporting event such as the Olympics, fans don't travel to attend bringing tourism, there isn't a high level of sponsorship so it's basically a night where a country can show views of the host city, though the global audience is an impressive 125 million, to people that have no intention of travelling to or spending money towards their economy, it's essentially a £30m postcard.

   Tonight the competition is held in Baku, the capital city of Azerbaijan and they have spent more than their annual tourism budget preparing and promoting the event, for a smaller nation like Azerbaijan, it's perhaps a good risk to take, getting to take centre stage for one night to show the world what they have to offer but do the rewards really justify the means? That's money that could build a new hospital, fund healthcare, education or create jobs potentially.

   Spain has urged it's entrant, Pastora Soler, to not win the contest as the country is enduring massive cuts in an attempt to control their spiralling debts. While it could be argued that winning would lift the mood of the nation, with the global recession it's a good logic politically. Pastora has publically admitted this but there are most likely a few other entrants that have been told the same thing.

   The bookies favourite to win is Sweden who have hosted the event 4 times previously, they are a stable country who wouldn't see it as a disaster if they did win. Great Britain has sided with crooner Engelbert Humperdinck (real name is Arnold Dorsey) and Europeans are excited to see how he does, if Mr Humperdinck was to win, the BBC licence fee would be used to pay for next year's show presumably.

   There is no country in a worse state financially in Europe than Greece, can you imagine the look on the face of their prime minister should they win tonight? Actually, I'd tune in just to see that.

The Avengers juggernaut (not Cain Marko)

As of writing, The Avengers movie (Avengers Assemble in the UK due to the 'New Avengers' TV series starring Joanna Lumley, Avengers Assemble sounds like a film about a group of superheroes who attempt to put together some flat pack furniture) has grossed worldwide almost $1.2billion (around £800million, how Greece must of wished it made this movie to solve all that countries money problems) and shows no sign of slowing down. It was released less than 3 weeks ago and is currently the 4th highest grossing film of all time behind Avatar ($2.78b), Titanic ($2.18b) and Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2 ($1.32b), while it should overtake the last Harry Potter movie in the next week, it remains to be seen if it can compete with the two James Cameron goliaths but it has that potential.

I saw The Avengers in 3D on the day it was released worldwide, the marketing and hype for the movie were years in the making, the slow hype has paid of, in the 2008 Iron Man film, there was the tease of Captain America's (I wonder if the true cause of America's financial problems come from Captain America asking for his back pay) shield and in the 2010 sequel, Iron Man 2, the closing credits featured Thor's hammer 'Mjolnir' to leave fans waiting for the characters solo movies leading into this collective collaboration.

   The Avengers features Iron Man, Captain America, Thor and The Incredible Hulk, the two flawed Hulk movies, Thor and Captain America (After watching Captain America, I feel like riot police aren't using their shields properly) have done well at the box office but compared to other Marvel movies, have been modest at best. Iron Man has fared better but nowhere in the league of the Sam Raimi's Spiderman trilogy or The Dark Knight. The success of combining these characters has delightedly astounded Disney (who bought the rights to The Avengers and Iron Man 3 from Paramount) but why has the movie seemingly come out of nowhere to do so well.

   The answer is simply that it is a damn good movie and people want to see it again. The success of Avatar and Titanic was that the audience went back again and again to see the film. If someone hasn't seen Avengers and needed someone to go with, i'd happily go again and see it. It's a feel good film, a family film that most ages can enjoy. It's interesting what Marvel has created leading up to this film, 4 completely different film franchises, all leading up to this one point, each character given their established plot, specific traits and their own big personality. This is the first time that i can think of where a studio has spent 4 years creating a universe to set up one BIG blockbuster. For all the special effects, explosions and nasty villains, the actors are given ample time to shine in their roles and most importantly, no-one is deemed superior to others, they are equal. It's a great feel good movie with cinematic magic and no matter how much marketing a studio does to promote their films, there is nothing like word of mouth to fill cinema seats and has anyone heard a bad word said about this film?

The film isn't perfect (where does the Tesseract come from and what exactly can it do?) but it's exactly what a summer blockbuster should be, The Dark Knight Rises is released in a couple of months and the bar has been set very high in 2012.

View The Avengers trailer here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPoHPNeU9fc

View The Dark Knight Rises trailer here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8evyE9TuYk